Summer So Far

Well, summer has struck the great North Coast. Well, at least Blue Lake that is.  I love the weather we have here in Humboldt, again, at least here in Blue Lake. I have lived here the majority of  my life and still it never ceases to amaze me how just a couple of short miles inland (Blue Lake) completely changes the weather. It will be foggy in the next town over, but beautiful and sunny here, and even hotter just a few more short miles inland where we have some family property we get to enjoy whenever we want (schedule allowing). So, summer so far: Tom is gone (I know, I sound like a broken record, but you send your firstborn off into their adult life and see how you handle it :0) ). We are all adjusting pretty well. We all miss him a lot, and God has been so good to us to keep us busy and occupied. I never though I would call the business of our lives "good" but, all that business keeps us from being a bunch of whiners about being a man down around here. We are doing our best to take full advantage of our inland property while we can.  Kids playing in the creek, trying to catch lizards, trying to catch butterflies, campfires, more creek time...quality time with family and friends that does not require a TV or anything electronic. Just good old fashion fellowship in the great outdoors. Asides from a sunburn here or there, occasional scraped knees, tic checks at the end of each day, we have it pretty good around here. I feel so blessed that God loves me so much. I can't wait to share summer times at the creek with new friends, old friends and just some one on one family time. Summer so far, has been an amazing adventure for us, certainly nothing dull about this summer. Can't wait to see what the rest of summer has in store for us. Hope you are all having a wonderful summer as well!!! Blessings!!!

Life

It's amazing to me sometimes how life is, how God moves, how things change.  I just spent 10 days with my sister and her family and if felt more like 2 days. Sooo much activity, so many changes: baby's being born (WELCOME LEVI)  baby's growing up and shipping off to the Army, baby's learning that sometimes when you think you have it all together-you realize you have completely lost your focus. (That would be me :0) ) As I try to take a moment to focus in everything happening in our lives, I was stunned to hear the Lord say REMEMBER ME?? Not quite in question form. As a matter of fact, it was more in the form of a song, I think it's even called Remember Me by Mark Schultz: Remember Me, I remember you.  A gal sang that the Sunday I was at my sisters church, and I realized not that I had "forgotten" about the Lord, but I certainly was not devoting my time, my trust, my comfort or my concerns to Him. I was bundling them all up in a not so pretty package and laid it right on my heart so that all I could feel was chaos. Then in that one phrase "remember ME, cause I remember you", I was able to take a deep breath and cry a little at my shame of what I had allowed to overtake me, and cry a little more that I have such a loving Father that he literally told me to remember Him....REMEMBER ME....FOCUS ON ME.  So, I have had to resolve, and may need some reminding from time to time, that I will focus on God my Father, Jesus my Savior, and the Holy Spirit my Comforter, THREE IN ONE. I will focus on the joy that is my life, the joy that is my family, the joy that is my friends, the joy that is my learning more and more from the Lord each and every day and most of all the joy that is Jesus.
I hope you all have a joy filled day? no, a joy filled life!!

T Minus 20 and Counting....

Well, it's all becoming more official.  We are now officially in June, we are now officially on the countdown of many things: Toms first prom, my birthday, Toms graduation, Toms graduation BBQ at church (not just his, but he is part of the brood of graduates), me and the kids heading down to Stockton, somewhere in there my new little niece being born, and then the real official date: JUNE 21, the day I take Tom to the hotel and drop him off to be shipped to Georgia the next day. Somehow, I suspect the next three weeks are going to be a blur, which is sad to me because suddenly I feel the urge to cram all the would have should have could haves in, which of course will be impossible. But I plan to enjoy, to the best of my ability, the next three weeks. The pride of seeing him in his tux, with his beautiful (in every way) girl on his arm heading to prom. The joy of watching him walk the platform and receive his diploma. The fun of a long car ride with him and the other chickadees. And somehow try to enjoy the time of driving him up to Sacramento, checking him into his hotel, taking him to dinner: just him and I, and then dropping him back off at the hotel, and not see him again for at least three months. I love my children with every fiber of my being, but I am not really one of these mushy kind of moms...I envy those moms sometimes, but, that is just not who I am: or at least not who I thought I was, now that we are on a very short countdown, I am discovering I am MUCH more mushy that I originally thought.
If my son ever reads this, I hope he knows how VERY much I love him, how VERY honored I have been to raise him and call him son, and how VERY proud of him I am of how he has "turned out", the life choices he has made.
I know I am a rambler, but I just needed to ramble today. :0)

God of All Comfort

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort which we ourselves are comforted by God." 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Merriam-Webster defines comfort as: 1) to give strength and hope to, and 2) to ease the grief or trouble of.
The International Standard Bible Encyclopedia defines comfort as: to call along side of i.e. to summon for assistance....to cheer and encourage....it indicates the dispelling of grief by the impartation of strength.
God IS all of the above, and not only that, He wants US to be all of the above, but we can't be a comfort unless we let HIM be our comfort...."that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort which we ourselves are comforted by God". We can't give something we don't have...you have to have possession of something before you can give it to anyone....you can't give love, if you don't know what love is, or feels like, you can't forgive unless you know what forgiveness feels like...on and on...
We want to be a comfort to people we know and love and clearly need comforting, but I think sometimes we hesitate because maybe we don't know how to comfort, we are afraid comforting will require sacrifice (by the way, it does), we are afraid our attempt to comfort will be rejected...etc. etc. I think, clearly by scripture, we need to recognize how God comforts us...that is our pattern. 
How does God comfort ME? Well, as cliche and it may sound, the best most rewarding comfort comes from His word, I gain comfort from praise and worship, I gain comfort from the fellowship I have with my friends, and there are times, that I need His comfort so badly that when I cry out to Him (with groaning which cannot be uttered) I can practically feel His arms around me. So what does that mean for me comforting others? Well, I would say, most of the time, comfort comes in the form of "touch"....I mean, put your arms around that person and tell them you love them and you are there for them...pray for them, we by far underestimate the power of prayer...maybe send them a little card in the mail, add some comforting scripture....I would say, think about how you are comforted by the God of ALL comfort and use that as your pattern.
Have a truly blessed day!!

Duty Calls

I guess for the most part "Duty Calls" is more a Thomas thing, than mine...going into the Army and all, however, I am struggling with my duty call at being his mom. Don't get me wrong...it's not a struggle to be his mom...well, not always...but it is a struggle watching him turn 18, and knowing he is graduating soon and going off to start his life as a U.S. Soldier. I am so proud of him, and yet....fighting an overwhelming sadness at the same time.  I was NOT prepared for how him turning 18 was going to shake me up as much as it has....I can only imagine what will happen when he is actually gone?!?!?!?!!! It has been hard, at times, being a mom...and yet an overwhelming joy watching him grow into the young man he has become.  It's like I blinked and we went from talking about Hot Wheels to talking about his future plans for life....and by future, I mean a month from now...A MONTH FROM NOW!!! It has all reminded me to savor every moment with my other two at home.  We still have quite a few years before they are off and running, but again...try not to blink, cause that IS how fast it goes. Ahhhh...well, that is my rambling for today....a woe is me, my baby is not a baby anymore...grrr....
Hope everyone has a great day!!

Retreat: Part 2

Ok, retreat part 2...uh.....AMAZING!!!

The above picture is of me and three of the most amazing women I know....my only problem is there are about 5 other women who should have been in that picture.  Hopefully after next years retreat, I will have a pic of us all to share with you.

SO, retreat....Faith, Hope, Love...that was our theme.  I knew that going in, and I knew that there were going to be three workshops that ran simultaneously on each of those three subjects, it was so hard for me to figure out what one I was supposed to go to, all the way up until the first night there, then God made it clear to me where I needed to go.  I went to: Love. My wonderful friend taught the class, she did an amazing job! I am so thankful for her. So, her class reminded me of some things I had neglected, but you know how sometimes, the journey is way better than the destination....it was kind of like that for me this weekend.  I don't know that I would say that being there and fellow shipping was better than the class...it's more like it was just as good as the class. The Lord spoke to me through so many avenues this weekend, and I am so thankful for such an amazing God!

One thing I will touch on is that things get crazy sometimes in a marriage, mine is certainly no different.  Going to this retreat in the midst of a very hard time for me and my man, I needed to step back and see things for what they really were.  A couple things I was reminded of was that I am not God to my man, and I need to quit trying to do God's job....it's God's job, not mine. My job is to be there for my man, loving him and supporting him....God's job (and my man's) is the rest.  It was almost liberating for me to realize that is what I have been doing. Well, maybe not almost...it IS liberating. 

Another thing God showed me, which may not make sense to a lot of people, is, I have a little guy who gets pretty emotional and when he is on overload, he really breaks down....and the way I calm him is to take his face in my hands, make him take a deep breath, make him look me in they eyes and I gently tell him, "It's o.k., everything is going to be just fine...you need to calm down, it's o.k." Well, as you can imagine, THAT exact thing is what I felt the Lord telling me this weekend, I "felt" HIM cup His hands around my face, tell me to focus on Him, keep breathing, and tell me, "It's o.k., everything is going to be just fine, just focus on me, it's o.k."  MAN, I love the Lord!!! I am so thankful He is in control of my life!!

Well, that was a couple of highlights of my retreat....there really is so much more, like ladies being baptized in the ocean, ladies being baptized in the lake, good food, speed loving, fellow shipping till the wee hours of the morning and laughing harder than I have in a long while....so much fun, so little words.

Hope you all have an amazing day! <3

Retreat: Part 1

I decided to go ahead and post about retreat, before retreat. :-) It never ceases to amaze me how amazing God's timing is.  With so much personal "junk" going on, and really feeling, well...not the greatest I have ever felt, I am soooo thankful to have this retreat to...retreat to.  I need my battery recharged!  I know that with as much warfare as we have had, me and my family....my friends and their families...etc....that God is going to do something amazing this weekend, and I can't wait.  I can't wait for the car ride there with my "sisters", I can't wait to "get away from it all" and have time to truly focus completely on God, and listen for His direction.  I know part of my "junk" is my own doing, my own bad attitudes, my own wrong reaction to things....the thing about retreat is, you have a set apart time to refocus and get down and dirty with God and ask Him to really help you get the self control you need TO respond to life properly...THAT is what I am looking forward to. I can't wait for the lessons I will learn this weekend, the relationships that will grow deeper, and the car ride back with my sisters.  I know that if we will just let go, if we will just leave the cares of life behind and focus on the joys of life instead, if we will let God have complete control (yes I said control) of our weekend...in fact, our lives....that nothing but amazing things can and will happen.  No, not a life without issues, or "junk" but a life that is SO focused on HIM that we can see His hand at work in those "junky" times and sing a song of love, joy, and thanksgiving in our heart, knowing HE KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING!!!
I kind of feel like I am rambling a bit, but I just want to say, I am sooo looking forward to retreat, and I can't wait to tell you all about it when we get home.
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend.

I gotta be better about this

Yes yes, I know, it has been forever since posting, and frankly, I am not sure anyone even reads these things, but that's ok.  We have been so busy it's ridiculous. Lots of changes in our family.  We have a son who is leaving for bootcamp in the next couple of month...can't believe it's already about that time, we recently felt the Lord asking us to step out in faith and move on from where we have been going to church for YEARS!!!  I just want to take a moment to address that... We have been members of our church for years...as a matter of fact, Erik was heavily involved in ministry...I was involved, but mostly as a help mate recently....anyway, we felt the Lord calling us out from there and it was one of the most difficult things we have ever had to obey HIM in...we love that church, we love those people, we love the teaching...it did not make sense to us, but it was clear clear clear that we had to step away and it is purely a step of faith.  We don't really know what's next, but we ARE trusting God and taking it a step at a time.  It really is important to me that people who know us and know the church know that there was not some big bad thing that happened or that we were unhappy or anything like that, I really don't want rumors to get started...we just had to be obedient and that's that. We are completely excited about the future, the present is a little hard because it's new, but we know HE has a future and a purpose for us...please keep us in prayer.
Other than that, there is not a lot, but yet a lot going on....anybody know what that's like?? :-) I (again) am going to try to be better about posting...until next time, everyone have a great day....IT'S GOOD FRIDAY....Praise the Lord for my SALVATION!!

Grrr....

You know...I WAS supposed to be better about blogging, but somehow, time just slips by, I get hooked into Facebook, I get too too busy and here you go, over a month goes by and no blog.  OK Lord, help me be better about this.
I am making it short, still, lots going on..especially today (took my daughter to the ER) but one thing I know, and am infinitely thankful for...God is in control....I am NOT in control.....God is in control!!!

Valentines day is soon, and I just have to say that no matter what (and there have been plenty of "whats") I am so in love with my husband, so thankful that God put us together, and barring the Lord's return, am excited to spend the next 50+ years with him. Hope you all have a great valentines day!!!

A New Year

Well...it's 2010.  I really have a hard time believing it.  Well, accepting it is more like it.  So, if you ever read my blog...you know that I am very proud to say that I have a teenage son who has joined the Army....all that has been wonderful until 2009 turned into 2010.  I don't know what came over me....but the new year overwhelmed me with the reality that 2010 is when Tom GRADUATES HIGH SCHOOL!!! And even more...2010 is when he leaves for bootcamp.  For some reason, when it was 2009 it seemed far off...but now that it is officially 2010....not so far away.  Yes...we have about six more months..but still...it is only SIX more months....grrr. I am working very hard to hold in the tears....I can't be "Sappy Mom" for the next six months....I will have to wait till like the last five months maybe... ;-)

So, today...the kids are back in school, the hubby is at work, and I have my home back to myself. A friend and I were just talking last night about how much we aboslutely adore our families....but having our homes to ourselves is something to be cherished.  I can actually get things done when there are no distractions around.  So, I have the chicken tortilla soup going in the crock pot and a spice cake baking in the oven...all for bible study tonight..I can fold my laundry in my own time with no distractions....I can clean up the kitchen in my own time, with no distractions.  Then, my family will come home, friends will come over, we will study God's word....and it will all be so very wonderful. I ache for ALL my friends and family to be right next door, or just down the street so we can all get together whenever we want....but it's time for me to stop being a whiner about it and be thankful for emails, phones....cars that make some drives 3.5 hrs...others 6 hrs. Thankful to have all these people in our life...for just the right moments in just the right places....with just the right things to say or things to do.

It's a new year....and it's going to be a dramatically changing year for my family...so...instead of longing for things I can't have (like Mom's who live in the same town as me...sister's who live on the street between us and friends that live close enough to meet for coffee) I am going to enjoy every moment of this year...

Happy New Year everybody...have a wonderfully blessed day.